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Posted on 2012.05.28 at 09:06
Feelin': thankfulthankful
Got my results in the morning and syukur alhamdulillah! I'm a graduate :D 

Firstly, I felt the wave of built-up tension from last night was over me with relief... and then i kept reading through my results. First A of Uni life... in my last Sem...nothing lower than a B-, which is uncharacteristic of me! haha.. Then, immense joy as I came to a realisation that I've done it. I've really did it... After my horrid first semester and 2 failed modules... I have graduated. 

SMSed my parents... thanked them. Whatsapp DBB, then Datuk K gang.. then Mat Engineers. Lastly, Aisyah... cos I felt she deserved to know. I don't care much for her reply.. she's always busy. But i'll do my part and let her know how helpful she's been. 

Now, this. I don't wanna tweet about it.. only to those who asked: Mahdi, Fiq and WS. Which means many others could read it too, but it's alright. Haha.. i cried alot. Sujud syukur on my bed. And cried somemore.. tearing a little still now.

What an awesome past 12 hours or so, masyaAllah. Nini's farewell.. and turns out Fauzie too with his scholarship. Amazing, amazing stuff. 

New phase in life. Alhamdulillah. 



Posted on 2012.02.13 at 22:07
Feelin': sadsad
Tags: ,
Today is an immensely sad day for me.

After 3 rounds of selection, Honda Motor is not hiring me. I've been banking alot of hope on that job. Sigh.. we move on.

These days, she's been a constant in my mind, occupying my every thought. Didn't help that I watched the last 2 episodes of Chuck and turned into a major sap as Sarah lost her memory and Chuck was just... damn sad. Jeffster had an epic finale. Ellie and Awesome moving on to greener pastures. Casey too. Morgan... everyone. No more BuyMoria. Burbank. Castle. Intersect. 
End of an awesome awesome TV show. I will rewatch the entire thing again one day.

Plus side today is the great news that a close friend of mine just got employed this morning and I was among the first of the guys to know. Also bought Mizuno Supersonic Wave for $60! Second hand though but such soft, supple leather boots are hard to come by. Especially this Japan-only edition. ;D

I still wish I could do a Chuck and try winning Sarah over. The difference is, Sarah lost her memories. Times like this, I tawakkal. I'm sad today. Tomorrow will be better insyaAllah. La hawla wala quwatta illa billah......

I miss her like crazy.



Posted on 2012.02.11 at 01:06
Feelin': disappointeddisappointed

So today I suddenly missed her a lot. From building sandcastles in the morning til' Friday prayers. Popped by Ju's after that.

I realized my grandparents probably don’t know we’ve broken up :( They still ask about her. Does she call? Holiday tak balik? How is she? Meh. Hahah.. So sad! But life goes on. People change. Insya Allah for the better too.

"Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which i find myself constantly walking around in the day and falling in at night. I miss you like hell."

- Edna St Vincent Millay

abs of steel

And so it is, just like you said it would be...

Posted on 2012.01.28 at 14:57
Feelin': peacefulpeaceful
Tuned in to: Sara Bareilles - Gonna Get Over You
26th January 2012:

Woke up at 4 in the AM to catch Liverpool - Man City in the 2nd leg semis of the Carling Cup at Anfield. As it is, my Mio subscription is basic so I can't get it on the telly. Since i'm already up (but fighting sleep), I thought screw it, let's give the Reds a chance and stream the match on my Mac. As it turns out, a brilliant match ends at 2-2 and we're going to WEMBLEYYYYYY!!!

So I showered and prayed, before catching a nap at 7 cos I had class later at 10. Decided to e-mail her to apologise for the shit I've put her through. I've more or less come to terms with the break-up, as sad as I find it. As I was browsing my inbox, this Japanese name caught my eye. H*nda is calling me back for a third (and final?) round of interview! Syukur Alhamdulillah on Twitter and it's making me realise now as I type this that really, one door closes and another opens. God truly is amazing.

Didn't really tell anyone the news til' later. So as usual I came to class late, and met Famalinax at Forum cos she was on campus for an Esplanade road show. Layan-ed her for awhile and then bumped into confident Syarif at the carpark and we talked. About them discussing my tweets, the breakup, our job searches.. and off to work I went. KPE was surprisingly decent. First day of internship.. met new people, learnt new things and did plenty of hardwork.

Her mother called me at work. I was surprised to say the least. Pleasantly though :) Anyways she started with an "apa khabar?" and I thought she knew about us and wanted to talk to me about it. Fortunately I was wrong, she only wanted me to continue tutoring Ari. I had to decline, telling her about Japan and how it's better for someone to teach all the way to PSLE. So I said I'll help her find a tutor! 

That's that. I knocked off at 8pm, reached Masjid Kassim in time for Isya' but missed Maghrib :( After that I confirmed plans with J and decided on Glasshouse Fish & Co. Ate my fish & chips til I got sick of it, and caught up alot. Trying to understand the female mind after all these years and still failing at some points.. hahah.. Walked her to the MRT, sat on my bike in the very chilly Orchard night breeze and just thought things through. Feels so good to talk about stuff. 

Reached work at 10plus, then Friday prayers. Back to work and knocked off at 7 to go to boss' house for CNY. Gotta love the $Angpows$ ! Good time catching up with the crew, playing with Megan and Allie.. but BRO TIME was essential. RockHatt decided to meet me at Ameen Woodlands and there we sat for 3 hours straight. I downed one teh tarik and talked alot, he downed Kopi and Teh Halia and talked slightly less. Nevertheless, BRO TIME is still the best time. 

So it's Saturday. I'm off to work at CB! 


oh yes you are.

Posted on 2011.03.04 at 03:35
Feelin': distresseddistressed
Tuned in to: Westlife
So here we stand
In our secret place
With a sound of the crowd
So far away
And you take my hand
And it feels like home
We both understand
It's where we belong

So how do I say?
Do I say goodbye?
We both have our dreams
We both wanna fly
So let's take tonight
To carry us through
The lonely times

I'll always look back
As I walk away
This memory
Will last for eternity
And all of our tears
Will be lost in the rain
When I've found my way
Back to your arms again
But until that day
You know you are
The queen of my heart

Queen of my heart

So let's take tonight
And never let go
While dancing we'll kiss
Like there's no tomorrow
As the stars sparkle down
Like a diamond ring
I'll treasure this moment
Till we meet again

But no matter how far
Or where you may be
I just close my eyes
And you're in my dreams
And there you will be
Until we meet

Oh yeah
You're the
Queen of my heart
No matter
How many years it takes
I'll give it all to you
Oh yes you are
The queen of my heart

abs of steel


Posted on 2010.11.10 at 23:34
Feelin': gratefulgrateful
Today is a beautifully normal day.

Amidst the random slashing going on in the heartlands, the natural disasters, the weird acts of people in public, today is peaceful and the world was somewhat in unison.

I rode to school at just after noon, the Sun was still high up in the sky yet i had perfect weather, warm and soothing. Not sweltering hot, no scorching heat rays. Just nice. The clouds were like cotton in the blue sky.

The same for when I was riding back home. The night was cool, not freezing cold, not too chilly, just light breeze here and there and awesomely cool.

Traffic was not bad, traffic lights were being rather kind.

Sam Sparro (the bike) was behaving, good response, very smooth acceleration.

Learnt quite abit from one consultation with the Prof.

Played a pretty decent match against Singapore Power, came close to scoring with a long range effort which whizzed narrowly past the post.

My girlfriend is beautiful and awesome, as usual. haha.

Had lunch AND dinner at home, with family.

Syukur Alhamdullilah for all I have.


i'll stand by you

Posted on 2010.07.01 at 13:55
oh, why you look so sad
tears are in your eyes
come on and come to me now
don't be ashamed to cry
let me see you through
cos i've seen the dark side too

when the night falls on you
you don't know what to do
nothing you confess, can make love you less

i'll stand by you
i'll stand by you
won't let nobody hurt you
i'll stand by you

so, if you're mad get mad
don't hold it all inside
come on and talk to me now
hey, why you got to hide
i get angry too
well i'm alot like you

when you're standing at the crossroads
don't know which path to choose
let me come along
cos even if you're wrong

i'll stand by you
i'll stand by you
won't let nobody hurt you
i'll stand by you

take me in into your darkest hour
and i'll never desert you
i'll stand by you

and when, when the night falls on you baby
you're feeling all alone
you won't be on your own

i'll stand by you
i'll stand by you
won't let nobody hurt you
i'll stand by you



Posted on 2010.06.01 at 23:29
Feelin': contemplativecontemplative
i'm sad. i think i'm losing it. my passion for two wheels. The freedom and mobility i once enjoyed. All thanks to that damning accident. Reckless driver = danger. Except you can't do anything about it. On my ride home from Harbourfront after work just now, I was too alert. I've been TOO alert when riding. I mean, alert is a good thing. I keep myself safe from harm. But I've gone beyond that, i'm now paranoid. Afraid that every car will swerve into my lane without signalling. Like they are purposely trying to hit me. :(

When I told my friend about the accident and that I only made the cab driver compensate me $200, he said, "That's all your life is worth?" It was a rude shock. But I have my reasons. I know that he was utterly careless, and in all honesty I don't think he deserves to drive anymore. He's too old for it and anyone can tell, trust me. On the otherhand, you can't evaluate emotional and physical damage to human body. My dad told me to pity the driver as he was a part-timer. I didn't want to rip him off, $200 was enough to fix the damage on my bike. But now as I go through this trauma as I do something I used to thoroughly enjoy, it had me rethinking.

Whatever it is, I hope this shall pass. Insya Allah I'll be better. And hopefully my aunt too, as she been having the same paranoia when she drives.

abs of steel


Posted on 2010.05.26 at 00:04
got involved in an accident with a taxi outside Khatib NTUC. My girlfriend and i were uninjured and my GSR was barely damaged. Thank goodness i installed the frame sliders. The right side protected much of the bike, only broke my rear brake lever. It was so scary. I remember slowing down when I saw the taxi on the left lane signalling right. Cautious of taxi drivers like that. And women drivers too. You can tell them apart so easily. But i'll go back to that later. The taxi was signalling right and slowing down. I slowed down, cos he probably might just do something crazy. The moment I thought it was safe to proceed, I opened throttle and accelerated and he decides to do the crazy and make an illegal U-turn. I rammed straight into his right side and my bike was hit to the other side of the road. I was standing after that. It all happened too fast. In my mind was "IS SYA OKAY?!" and "I'm gonna kill this driver."

I was caught between checking if my gf was okay and opening the taxi drivers door. But i calmed down and checked on my girl. She was visibly shaken, shell-shocked obviously, but uninjured. Just sitting on the road. I didn't see blood, no broken parts. So i turned my attention to the old Chinese man in the car. He was probably shocked too, just sat still there. I opened his door and shouted something. The car behind me stopped and got out to check on us. He gave me his number if i needed a witness. Nice chap, should SMS him a thank you later. This happened two nights ago by the way. Sunday night, 1140pm. Just as we were going home from a nice day out, to recharge our batteries for the oncoming week. I snapped pictures, the taxi driver was just dazed. Didn't know how to speak English cos he was speaking Mandarin to me. Called my dad. Didn't know what else to do.

He came down, police arrived on the scene. "Lukman Hakim" I believe the Sgt was. Talked to the driver, I explained the situation. Moved my bike with the police chap's help. He told me no injuries no need police report. Can settle with insurance company. Or direct settlement with the driver. Which was the option I took cos I didn't want any hassle with insurance companies. The ah pek talked to my dad, cos even when he spoke Malay I could barely catch his drift. (Typing on this keyboard is lil leceh, bleagh.)

So I walked Sya home, we hugged real tight after that harrowing experience. I didn't like that sinking feeling of losing someone you love the most. Or even getting her injured. She hasn't been on the bike since. But its only been 2 days. Walked back to my bike, her parents none the wiser.

Rode home slowly, just 500m or so. Sigh. So many "what ifs" played through my head. We were supposed to go home earlier. Or take public transport that day. But everything happened for a reason.

The 3 bikes I've owned before:
1) August? 2006 - Vespa Excel FN4690L
2) January 2008 - Suzuki Bandit GSF-P FK6899E
3) April 2010 - Suzuki GSR 400 FBC9011U

Sorry, digressed. Decided to state those for memories sake. Thing is I was surprised I remembered all the plate numbers. :D

The following day I rode to work with a broken rear brake lever. Then went to Planet Motors at Ubi, after rounding Tamp Industrial Park 5 times in the heat cos Amri "ingeniously" claimed Planet was there. Lucky the iPhone has data plan to check SGBikes forum. Happened to see Sadiq do PE at ITE East beside SAFRA. A dying kitten was under the drain I parked on, but I didn't save it and til now I regret it. :( Met Ismail MJ at Planet and we talked and talked. Talked to quite a few bikers there. Nice people, nice workshop uncle Ah Chong.

Haven't returned to get new sliders since fixing the brake. The taxi driver came to my house to pay me $200 as compensation. I wanted more, cos it was my life at risk. But he really looked so sad and pitiful. His friend was the one helping him settle everything. Asked for $250 but he negotiated with my dad saying he's a part-time driver. He said "Sorry" to me as he entered my home. When he left, he absent-mindedly wore his friend's right shoe on his left foot. He's two years younger than my Granpa, but he looks so worn-out and all. Poor thing. I rmbrd the accident with Bandit in January 2009 at AYE. I hit the back of a pakcik's bike and it went from Lane 1 across 2 lanes to the bushes on the left. Amazing there were so many cars and when 2 bikes collided not one was hit. He didn't ask for compensation upon learning that i was a student. And I felt bad. God bless him.

That's it. My recollection. Funny how just days before that, I tweeted about how I know riding is dangerous but I wouldn't stop. It was because of a near miss. Lady driver at Still rode just swerved across 2 lanes. Those who drive big cars (the rich ones I presume) are the worst of the lot. They're so careless, poor judgement, lack of consideration for safety and lives of other. She could've hit me, I swerved hard to avoid her. Next time I really have to give these people a good lesson. Its so sad to have wreckless people on the roads. It really is. Sigh. I'm getting more protective gears. And I did have a phobia of signal lights and all kinds of cars the following day after that accident. Bah. In the end, I thank the Almighty for keeping my girlfriend and I safe. Syukur Alhamdullilah.

abs of steel

The Recluse.

Posted on 2010.05.06 at 02:52
Now is not a good time, dear mind.

One crucial final paper is at hand. Why, oh why.

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